Tangrams and Judges and other various things

In Discovery, a skill my students develop is spacial awareness. One way we accomplish this is by using tangrams. For those of who don't know (or don't remember), tangrams are a bunch of different shapes used to make one picture or design. So it goes something like this:

Step 1: Student makes shape following the lines on the picture...they can see each shape and how it fits in with every other shape in the picture.
Step 2: Student makes shape on blank outline of the shape. The "answer key" is still in view and can be used as a reference.
Step 3: The answer key is removed and student must replicate the shape perfectly.
Step 4: Next class, the student must replicate the shape perfectly again without any assistance.

Yesterday, student E was in step 4 of this tangram process. E just couldn't remember and couldn't remember the correct positions for the shapes, so finally I had to step in with several small hints because E was getting fairly frustrated. E had gotten some of the pieces correct but was struggling to see how the last 2 pieces fit in with the overall picture. There are 2 smallish triangles that when pushed together make a perfect square. E kept wanting to put these 2 triangles together to make it fit in a not very square-like shape. After several times of trying this, I finally mentioned that it probably wasn't correct that way. E looked at me and the pieces again and about 30 seconds late put the triangles back together and tried to put them in the same spot. I asked why and E looked at me and said "it looks like the most logical place to put them" and I responded with "Even though I already told you that it wouldn't work?" E looked at me and smiled kind of sheepishly and continued to work out the puzzle. And about a minute later...did it again! Perplexed, I asked why that seemed like best choice and the response was the same. It got a little comical when it happened one more time!!!!!

As I asked once again why it seemed like a good idea, when I had already told E that it wouldn't work, the answer shifted a little bit and the response was "I just didn't know what else to do with it!"

After a little more shifting, E finally figured out the right position for each piece.

But the thing that stuck with me was when E looked at me and said "Isn't it frustrating to watch me struggle and struggle and to have the answers right in front of you?" 

And then I started thinking about my 7th grade Bible class because we are about to have a test over Judges on Monday (I'm a mean teacher right...To give a test on a Monday...before you judge too harshly, I am going to make them treats:)

But anyway, the whole book of Judges is basically the people of Israel trying to figure out how to move into the promised land. At first God gives them really clear instructions and lays out the way for them to accomplish this. And after they try their way for a while, they end up in slavery. And then they looked to God and God says "Not that way" and then they smiled sheepishly and just try again to figure it out on their own and God always patiently said "Not that way" and this happens over and over again. And for goodness sake, wasn't God frustrated to watch His children struggle and struggle when He is holding the answers right in front of Him??

And then I thought about me. When E asked me if it was frustrating to watch, my first, initial answer was a resounding "yes!"....I had watched the struggle and had nudged in the right direction and E still wasn't getting it. But then my thoughts shifted and I felt nothing but compassion. I wanted so badly to give E the answer but realized E needed to come to the correct answer without me. I realized that the struggle was important for the end result.

And so often it feels like God is silent with me (even though He's not), and it feels like He lets me struggle and is fine with that over and over again (even though He's not). I'm so thankful God is not standing up in heaven with my life plan opened in front of him (the answer key) and is shaking it and wanting to yell at the top of his lungs "WHY CAN'T YOU JUST DO IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!!!"

And if I were to stop for just a moment and consider things, I could probably hear Him (or feel Him) saying "Not that way" in that gentle way that He does things. And it's incredible that He doesn't get frustrated with me as I struggle over the same things again and again and tell Him that it seems most logical for the moment...because I can't see the larger picture and how everything fits together. But I can trust that He knows what He's doing. I can trust that He will be faithful and compassionate and and let me struggle and in His perfect timing, I'll learn and grow and be changed and then be amazed at how silly I've been and how great God is.

 He is after all, holding the answers.